In my last post I mentioned that there were several things on my plate that were causing me stress, and that I had begun to cut myself some slack so that I could just live a little. You’ll be happy to know that the good parts have continued! I have been less focused on laundry, the divorce and responsibilites and more focused on happily living each day. Yesterday I even went to the movie theatre. All by myself! And I loved it! I saw Larry Crowne, with Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts. I loved the movie, and I had a big bag of buttered popcorn and a huge coke. I won’t even let myself think of the hundreds (thousands?!?!) of calories that I consumed, because it doesn’t matter. Everything in moderation, I always say. Or at least I’m starting to say.
As I said in the last post, my houseguests have moved out. They were here for only about six weeks, and while it was different, I really enjoyed having them here. I had some help with Jack, and with chores, but also, I had someone to talk to in the evenings when I get so lonely. I knew it was temporary, and when my friend told me she had found a full time job and an apartment I swallowed my dissappointment at losing them and celebrated her victory. After all her struggles, going through a divorce, becoming a single mother, moving twice, and now beginning to win back her independence, I was thrilled to see her realize some meaningful success.
So they are gone and I have my office back. Which is a great thing because I have found out that I do not keep up with my writing if the laptop is in my bedroom. Tonight I am sitting at my desk in my newly reclaimed office, which I am redecorating. I will post pictures soon.
For this weeks project, I have decided to attempt to limit my television time and use that time to do other things I would enjoy more. We have all read that excessive television viewing is linked to obesity and bad health, but I have a theory that it is also related to my sadness and depression. My theory is basically this: I am tired at night, so I watch tv. This means that I don’t get chores or projects done around the house. Therefore when I wake up the next morning, I find undone laundry or dishes, or go another day without finishing that quilt I’ve been working on for 6 years. This causes me to feel depressed and overwhelmed (and like a failure) so I am tired and sad. That causes me to want to do nothing but sit on the couch and watch tv. And thus, the cycle begins again. This doesn’t even take into account the lost opportunities to socialize with other people, or play with Jack and teach him something new, instead of watching yet another hour of “must see tv”.
So, I am breaking the cycle. At least for this week and then we’ll see how it goes. But today has been great, so far. I am allowing some tv time, but it’s only to allow myself to maintain a link to the outside world. I had it on a news show this morning while I was preparing Jack’s breakfast, then this evening, I watched the news again. It was a total of about 90 minutes of tv news, and honestly, if I can cut that down tomorrow, I will. I got far more information listening to the talk radio station while I was at work. So what did I get done today? Well…….
* Changed the sheets on my bed. This is a actually a big deal, because it’s a big-ass california king bed we bought for my 6’7” ex-husband who didn’t take the monstrosity when he left. I count this ridiculously time consuming, and exhausting activity as cardio, so I was able to skip my workout today. I am considering alternating which side of the bed I sleep on so that I can stretch this chore out another week.
* Worked four hours at my part time job.
* Cooked, divided and froze homemade baby food for Jack including sweet potatoes, butternut squash, crowder peas and a baby version of chicken chili. I prepared enough to feed him for two weeks, and have no tupperware left in the cabinets.
* Washed dishes. All of them. There isn’t a dirty dish in the whole house. Even the dog bowls got washed today.
* Transferred all my information to a new day planner. I love doing this! Is that weird? Nah! It’s awesome! New planner day!!!
* Mounted the baby monitor. My child is 15 months old and I have only today mounted the monitor above his bed. Prior to today, it was rigged up via the wire to hang over the closet door next to his crib. It worked fine, but I rarely went into his closet because I would have to disturb the wire hanging system. Today I found a dozen outfits in the closets that I had forgotten he even had.
* Listened to the Salsa-music station and danced with Jack for an hour. What a joyful noise it is to hear your child laugh and squeal when you dance him around the living room! When I get tired and put him down for a few minutes he bounces around and dances on his own! He and I are going to have a great time this week!
* Took a guitar lesson! This was so exciting and could be a project all in itself. I took lessons “the summer before everything changed” and really enjoyed it. I became quite good at performing the collected works of Miss Phoebe Buffett, from Friends, especially “Smelly Cat.” But in the turmoil of the past two years, I let this activity fall to the side. Well, I am on the search for happiness, dammit!! And I know that music makes me happy, so I am back at it. Tonight, I played and sang “You Are My Sunshine” for Sweet Baby J, and he loved it. See? I’m happier already…
So, if you’re game, join me in this weeks challenge and turn your own television off. For a few hours, for a day, for the rest of the week. Whatever you want to try. And then come back and post a comment and let me know what you got done. And if you hated it and turned the tv right back on, that’s cool, let me know that, too! Find happiness where you can. For me, maybe it’s in a house where the television isn’t on all day. I’ll let you know….
Have a good week!